Top 5 “Sorry for Being Churlish” Songs

Sometimes I am really moody and kind of mean to my husband. Truth be told, I am sort of a saucy chef and he probably deserves my added saltiness about 1% of the time…like when he pretended to put Third Eye Blind into his Top 250 list. Or when he cut my hair 3 inches above the permitted length line. But 99% of the time, he is just being his wonderful sweet self and I’m over here with Resting Bitch Face for no reason. I always feel bad after being such an atrocious woman and these are the Top 5 songs that play in my head as I try to figure out a way to apologize for my churlishness.

1) Chicago, “Hard to Say I’m Sorry

Really, if Chicago doesn’t play in your head at least twice a month outside your menstrual cycle, your relationship is broken.

2) Adam Ant, “Wonderful

I AM so tired of packaging the anger and ALWAYS…pushing you…away.

3) Dan Hill, “Sometimes When We Touch

The honesty is too much and I have to close my eyes and hide…in the bathroom…until my Ativan kicks in and I calm the fuck down and return to a semi-normal state of being. But I really do want to hold you til I die. PLEASE DON’T LEAVE ME.

4) Bryan Adams, “Please Forgive Me

Left over from childhood when my sisters would get in my face and sing this obnoxiously when they had done something to piss me off. It always worked.

5) Prince and the Revolution, “Purple Rain

Cue Uncle Joe’s imitation of Prince onstage at the club.

*Honorable Mention: Bob Dylan, “Just Like A Woman

This (kind of sexist?) song plays in my head not so much as a forgiveness anthem as a “get over yourself” theme. “Nobody has to guess that baby can’t be blessed til she finally sees that she’s like all the rest.” Dylan wouldn’t have put up with my nonsense. 🙁


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